ECCLESIOLOGICAL ETCHINGS
July 23, 2026
What does it mean to be fully forgiven? We’ve all known the experience when a person says that we have been forgiven, yet there is an underlying concern that at any given moment, our past actions will be brought up as a weapon of sorts. In such cases, that is not forgiveness. Forgiveness does not mean that a person forgets, yet it usually means the past no longer controls the future. Sure, certain boundaries may need to be set to simply protect the injured party moving forward. But if folks say they have forgiven us, yet the past is held over us, then it is not forgiveness. It is okay for someone to say, “I’m not ready to forgive” or “I will need some time to learn that I can trust you.” Those are very fair responses, especially when we have wounded or betrayed someone. At the end of the day, even as the one who might have been at fault, I want the injured party to be honest and not simply act as if forgiveness is something that must be done. If it feels like a requirement, then the necessary process will be skipped. As much as I may want to hear the words, “I forgive you,” at the end of the day, the hope is for both parties to find whatever healing is possible and for the relationship to be restored to its greatest potential. When we apologize, despite what we were taught as children, you may not find immediate forgiveness. It can’t be forced and no real timeline can be set by the one who caused the injury. It is sometimes hard to wait, but we need to trust the Holy Spirit to do what the Holy Spirit can do… but this might take months, years, or even more than a single lifetime.
Forgiveness is hard! It’s important for me to name that before you, Lord God. Walk alongside me during those times when I am working on offering forgiveness, while always making me aware of what steps are necessary. But also provide me with respectful patience for those who are trying to find the capacity to forgive me. At the end of the day, I want it to be truly restorative for all involved, even if the outcome is not what I had hoped for. Amen.
