ECCLESIOLOGICAL ETCHINGS
November 22, 2025
This Sunday is Thanksgiving Sunday because the Sunday immediately after Thanksgiving is the first Sunday of Advent. The second part of that statement was sort of difficult to type as I don’t feel quite ready for the Advent Season to be here. The funny thing is, no matter how much I feel ‘not ready’ for Advent, it still shows up. Yet I can’t allow my anxious thinking to jump to Advent without bringing some serious attention to this Sunday, Thanksgiving Sunday. Additionally, Thanksgiving is complicated. Maybe not for you, but for many people.
For instance, I know a Native American man whose father was at a religious “Boarding School.” The primary objective of the school was forced assimilation, which included the separation of families and cultural heritage. A 2024 government report shed light on the horrific abuse that occurred in these schools, which often resulted in tragic deaths. The report revealed at least 74 unmarked burial sites, where over a thousand children were buried. If this is your family’s history, it’s understandable why Thanksgiving might hold a different significance for you.
And then for other people, Thanksgiving is a day in which they feel it necessary to tolerate family or choose to distance themselves from family altogether. I remember one woman saying to a group of us, “My immediate family was so dysfunctional, yet Thanksgiving was the day extended family came to our home. So we as children were threatened with punishment if we gave even a hint of the abuse we experienced that was the result of parents who were alcoholics. For six hours, we put on a show of happiness and peace, only to say goodbye to our extended family and return to the misery.” It would be hard to rethink Thanksgiving in light of that kind of experience.
I share these two examples as a reminder that life is complicated for all of us. We encounter people whose complicated stories we do not know, but we are confused by their reaction to something like Thanksgiving. If you only have good memories of Thanksgiving, you’re left scratching your head and asking, “What’s the problem?” It’s a good reminder that people are dealing with issues of which we have absolutely no understanding. There are times when I hear one of those stories that appeared well hidden by the curtain of survival, and I think to myself, “It is only by the grace of God that this person is even standing before me.” So today, I am thankful for all those who are trying their best to make a way forward despite complicated, unhealthy, and even abusive experiences. I may not know a person’s story, but I can still show a little grace when that person’s actions or reaction seem strange… because, if I knew the whole story, the actions and reaction might be absolutely warranted.
As you have shown me plenty of grace, O Source of my gratitude, I pray for the capacity to show others grace. May my initial, and often ill-informed judgement, give way to a gracious assumption that I may not know the whole story. Amen.
